~~13~~

13 things over-heard that could go either way........

She: Wow….U have a lot of Brown on today! Did U know that brown is the new black?
1st He: no….I didn’t know that……go ask *** I’m sure he does.
She to ***: hey…did U know Brown is the new Black?
2nd He: funny that U should say that….my friend & were talking about that recently..she’s always telling me that Brown is the new Black.
She: U don’t wear a lot of Brown….
2nd He: Oh…I have a lot of Brown…its just not appropriate for work….
:::::pause for mental reflection and visual among the group::::
She & 1st he....quickly glance at eachother…wondering if the other is mentally envisioning the same thoughts?
1st He: we don’t want to see your Brown.
*** it was at this point that 2nd He did respond…however…..everyone within earshot had just gone blind & even now …..no one remembers the response……


So….how was your jog?
I don’t jog…I run…..
Oh…sorry…….
Yeah…that would be like me saying to U (the accomplished competitive swimmer) “how was your doggy styling last nite”?

:::crickets chirping:::….much laughter…..

Um….yeah…I don’t mind that U said that…..but in the future ..not a good idea to say that to a gay man!
I meant to say ….how was your “doggy paddling”…


I can make it a quick and dirty with her…..U don’t have to be there…but if U’d like to be?


He’s the one in the group that likes to grab the worm early everyday


Where has your face been? U’ve got fuzzy’s all over.


I’m going to the break room….need anything? Pause…. “besides a good spanking” um….no….I got that last nite.


U don’t look so good today…R U not feeling well? Yeah…the rainbow within isn’t shining as bright as usual…..


He: Did U see?
She: Yeah…..already saw that!
He: He’s hot…
She: Yeah….nice ASS, but his pants are too short……
He: Oh…honey….we can change that.
She: But he’s married
He: Yeah…..I don’t do married.
She: Y not?
He: Cause married munches pussy.
She: What did U just say?
He: Oh yeah….I don’t want that mouth on me after lickin the kitty…..


On a conference call…
“can U back away from the phone….U’re a bit too close”
From other party on call (we were all thinking it...but no one actually says it!))
“yeah like the next room over?”


“FOCUS DrM!”
& quick as a whip back at ** “ I am focused…I am woman….I can multitask….”
Yeah….filter missing that day!!


Every-time he responds during a conversation in the manner that he does…..it taints the level of trust I have for him……
“um…yeah…U need to stop using the word ‘taint’”


“my uterus is NOT happy today”….Don’t mess with me!”